I encourage you to pick an overarching story/message, either your mock trial experience, being an immigrant from Nigeria, or something else. Also hone in on the theme of resilience and courage and examples of experiences that demonstrate those qualities. Right now its coming off disorganized and lacking a specific focus. Here are some YouTube videos I've found to have useful information in writing my personal statement.

Narrative Essay Components

Writing Personal Statement-Expert Advice

3 Things to Avoid When Writing a Personal Statement

How to Start Writing a Personal Statement

Your personal statement should feel personal and give some insight into the type of lawyer/law student you'd be. Hopefully you find this helpful in some way or another.