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Insecure about pushing back test date (socially)

beezmoofbeezmoof Alum Member
in General 555 karma

I graduated from undergrad this past May, did a fulfilling internship abroad, then came home to start studying for my LSAT. I thought I would take it in Dec but my PS course didn't adequately prepare me and I found 7sage too late. Planning to take in Feb, but even considering taking it in June if my scores aren't consistently in the 170s by the Feb date.

I can't help but feel embarrassed that I've taken time off to come home study for this exam while my impressive, high achieving friends are off with their shiny new post-grad jobs. I decided to take time off/study at home because I know personally that I'm pretty anxious with standardized exams and wanted to feel fully prepped. My diagnostic was also much lower than I wanted it to be. I feel lesser telling them "I'm studying for the LSAT."

Now I can't help but feel even more embarrassed with the thought of pushing the date back and them knowing/judging me, etc.

Has anyone been in a similar situation with friends? How did you deal with it? I feel dumb for even typing this out, but it's getting to the point where I think it's affecting my studying bc I feel like I'm doing something wrong.

Comments

  • TheMikeyTheMikey Alum Member
    4196 karma

    Who cares what other people are doing! Focus on yourself and don't compare yourself to others because trust me when I say this, people will always judge you even if you're "doing the right thing".

    For you right now, the right thing is to study for a a test that will get you to where you want to be. I studied for 2 years and yeah I had some friends say "damn, that's so long man why are you studying so long, when are you gonna start school, blah blah blah", but I just simply told them that I want to go to a good school and am trying to get as high of a score as I can. Now, the friends who have asked me didn't belittle me, they were just always curious about why I studied so long. Inform your friends if you need to, but if they still don't understand then ehh....

    Be happy for your friends for getting great post-grad positions of course, but don't compare yourself to them and think of yourself as "lesser". Sure, your friends may be where they want, but this is just the step you need to do in order to get where you want.

    Focus on studying and you will be fine. If someone happens to belittle you for studying for an exam that will get you into a graduate program, they're an idiot and aren't your friend.

    Good luck with studying, and just remember to stay positive!

  • xtinextinextinextine Member
    861 karma

    You aren't alone! I'm dealing with a similar situation. It's difficult when friends don't fully understand this process. I have friends who took the GRE for Masters programs and they wonder why I'm still working on the LSAT.

    I took the LSAT in September and December, but I fully anticipate having to delay a cycle since I don't think I performed well on December.

    With that being said, my advice is to keep your head up and focus on what's right for yourself. I struggle with this, myself. I still feel a little embarrassed, too. But in the end, it will be worth it. Think of it as short term vs. long term rewards. While it might feel shitty to postpone, in the long run, your studying will pay off.

    As I've been told before: "You're your own worst enemy." While in my head I feel embarrassment from having to delay a cycle to retake the LSAT for a final time, in reality, friends/family don't fully understand the commitment and therefore have really no right to judge how long this path should take. I've learned it's different for everyone.

    So don't let any fear of embarrassment hold you back from focusing on your studies. You can do it! :smile:

  • kimpg_66kimpg_66 Alum Member
    1617 karma

    You're not gonna get anywhere comparing yourself to your friends. Think about when you go to law school: there will always be someone who had more impressive internships, who ran two startups, or who's aunt is the head of Yale Law Admissions. It happens. Doesn't mean your experiences are any less valid.

    But what good does that do you? Put your head down and prove them wrong. Tbh one of my motivators is being able to tell people I'm going to Harvard Law. Could you imagine if you didn't get into your dream school because you let your friends get into your head? Or worse, you were jealous at their success?

  • Seeking PerfectionSeeking Perfection Alum Member
    4428 karma

    My first piece of advice would be to not make decisions based on others opinions of you.

    However, failing that, just make sure to take the future into account. They will be more impressed when you get into the law schools you get into as a result of your LSAT score, they will be more impressed if you take a scholarship and end up debt free sooner, and they will be more impressed if you get whatever the career in law is that you want which the better schools you get into as a consequence of a better LSAT score will give you a better chance is.

    So either ignore your friends' opinions or accept that their opinions of you will matter in the future too.

  • TexAgAaronTexAgAaron Alum Member
    1723 karma

    @beezmoof Hey I'm in the same shoes. Graduated December of 2016 and I've had to push the test off multiple times. I currently work part-time as a server so I can focus on the LSAT and have had the same thoughts as you. Its hard to see a lot of your peers doing great things while you're just studying for a test and not doing anything with your shiny, new bachelor's.

    I constantly fight the urge to go get a "big boy" job just to satisfy the want to have something meaningful. In reality though, that may mean pushing off law school and never getting another chance to go again....something I don't want to do. I urge you to stay the course and keep pushing, even if that means pushing your test back. Its tough pill to swallow (did it 3 times myself for a multitude, but good reasons) but it will be worth it in the end when you have your J.D. in your hand.

    Lastly, context is everything in life. Things happen that change the pace of where everyone is. Example being me. I took a year off between sophomore and junior years, transferred across the country, completely changed my major and career path that first semester, worked a part-time job during school forcing me to have 2 failed attempts at prepping for the LSAT and having to wait till after graduation to study. Oh and then I moved this past summer, costing me a lot of valuable time. Not an extreme case but my point proven none the less.

    Do people probably judge me? Probably. Will their judgments matter when I get in to law school next cycle? No. I can't let it. Just because you don't fit the normal timeline doesn't mean you're any worse than them.

    Hope this encourages you! I'm right there with you. Keep fighting and after the next cycle, we'll get the last laugh holding our acceptance letters!

  • beezmoofbeezmoof Alum Member
    555 karma

    I realize I worshipped all the responses mentally but never actually wrote out a thank you. So thank you everyone for taking out the time to help me in my moment of despair. As with everything in life, it's nice to know you're not alone, so special thanks to those of you who shared that they were/are in similar positions. For those of you who are done w the LSAT, congrats and good luck. For my study buddies, good luck and we can do this.

    @TheMikey "but this is just the step you need to do in order to get where you want." TRUE! Yes!
    @xtinextine "Think of it as short term vs. long term rewards. While it might feel shitty to postpone, in the long run, your studying will pay off." It WILL pay off. Positive thinking.
    @kimmy_m66 "tbh one of my motivators is being able to tell people I'm going to Harvard Law." Ever since I read this, I've been doing the same and it honestly works wonders. Thank you.
    @"Seeking Perfection "They will be more impressed when you get into the law schools you get into as a result of your LSAT score, they will be more impressed if you take a scholarship and end up debt free sooner, and they will be more impressed if you get whatever the career in law is that you want which the better schools you get into as a consequence of a better LSAT score will give you a better chance is." You've convinced me :)
    @akeegs92 Glad I have a buddy in this process. We will kill it. "Just because you don't fit the normal timeline doesn't mean you're any worse than them." You're so right.

  • goingfor99thgoingfor99th Free Trial Member
    edited December 2017 3072 karma

    If you go to a top school, in all likelihood it will be your friends who end up socially intimidated by you eventually. :]

  • Tom_TangoTom_Tango Alum Member
    902 karma

    Tell them to eat a bag of shit if you get the impression they're judging you. Do your own thing; it's your life. If you feel belittled, they are probably not really your friend. This goes for any 20-something who also feels insecure about going to school late in the game. I hear this all the time since I'm in my late 20s and I just kind of laugh on the inside knowing that people who rush into things are going to wash out in the end.

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