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Free Essay Editing. Looking for Diversity Statements, Addenda, "Why Us?" and Yale 250s.

David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
edited July 2015 in General 7375 karma
7Sagers,

I’m David, the editor who’s designing 7Sage’s new personal statement bundle. I'm looking for diversity statements, addenda, “why us?” essays and Yale 250-word essays that I can use in the course. Send your essays to info@davidbusis.com; I'll choose a few of each to edit for free so long as you let me post an anonymous version of the final product and the drafts. Note that I'm no longer offering free editing for personal statements.

I'll choose the essays on a rolling basis, so the sooner you send yours, the better chance you have of being picked. You'll hear a definite yes or no from me by July 25, but probably sooner.

Happy studying.

David

Comments

  • silcal11silcal11 Member
    47 karma
    That's great, thank you!
  • hrjones44hrjones44 Alum Member
    323 karma
    what about character and fitness?
  • hrjones44hrjones44 Alum Member
    323 karma
    i guess i'll know soon if i need help, within a week..
  • PacificoPacifico Alum Inactive ⭐
    8021 karma
    That might fall under the addenda he mentioned but I'm not sure. It's tough to know a lot of this stuff before the apps come out since there can be some changes from year to year.
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    HRJones, everyone: Yes. Send character and fitness essays. I'm making a lesson group that covers all non-PS essays.
  • Dr. YamataDr. Yamata Member Inactive ⭐
    578 karma
    What's your opinion on adding a diversity statement for LGBT candidates? Also, how would that go over in a "red state" like Texas where LGBT rights are actively opposed in government? Would it be wise to concentrate on this topic or just not mention it and focus on other aspect of myself?
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    edited July 2015 7375 karma
    @"Dr. Yamata" I think being LGBT can be a good reason to write a PS. I'd send it to schools in Texas, too. Remember that schools are, in general, bastions of liberalism, and a law school in Texas might be even more likely to want to attract LGBT candidates for the very reasons you mention.
  • PacificoPacifico Alum Inactive ⭐
    8021 karma
    So much this^^^
  • 24 karma
    If you post our final/edited essays anonymously (THANK YOU btw)...can we still use them for our applications..even though everyone will see them? >.< Lol I don't want it to seem like I'm plagiarizing myself or stealing essentially (if you get my awkward question)? >.< >.<
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @StandingOnTheSun180--I don't anticipate that being a problem. First of all, the essays are behind a paywall. Second of all, the admissions officers will have no reason to think you plagiarized.
  • 24 karma
    @david.busis Okay awesome..thanks! ^^
  • medianplus30medianplus30 Member
    36 karma
    @david.busis I saw you posted a similar thread about a month ago. Do you routinely ask for essays every so often? I am still revising my PS on my own, and I do not want to reveal it to anyone until I think it's decent.
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @ashleyisbadname I don't routinely ask for essays. I need them to build the 7Sage course.
  • medianplus30medianplus30 Member
    36 karma
    Ah. Okay. But will you still be offering editing services after that date? (Of course, I know it won't be free).
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @ashleyisbadname Yes. You can contact me any time about essay editing.
  • medianplus30medianplus30 Member
    36 karma
    I'm a LGBTQ candidate, too. Would it be a bad idea to discuss the idea of self-acceptance? I belong to other minority groups, and and I examine the world differently because of how I grew up.

    I know schools want diversity, and the LSAC has a series of videos on 'coming out' on the app. The applicants featured in the videos mentioned desires to practice LGBT law. Though some said they mentioned their 'coming out story' in their ps, no one really said anything about self-acceptance. I could see a more conservative reader being okay with an applicant discussing a desire to practice LGBT law, but I wonder if they would be put-off by an essay that countered their morals.

    I don't intend to focus on just that in my PS, but I wonder if I should mention this at all.
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @ashleyisbadname I think self-acceptance is a great theme. When you're writing a diversity statement, you're almost definitionally not writing for a socially conservative reader. Anyway, you don't have to make a broad culture-war type argument; you should focus on your own experience.
  • seth.corleyseth.corley Alum Member
    29 karma
    I have a question. I'm a theology major and also have a significant background in ethnography. Part of what I really think would make me a good contributor to classroom discussion is that I have a good understanding of many faiths, good understanding of who adherents of these faiths are as people (because of my ethnographic background in large part), a very deep theologically and ethnographically informed understanding of the Christian and am used to having dialogues in academic settings with people who don't share the same views, but while coming to a deeper understanding of how our worldviews affect our views of social and ethical issues and having fruitful dialogue because of it. I also think I have an obscure perspective on a lot of things, because I grew up in and around rural white poverty. Are either of these useful? I'm wondering how much faith is taboo in personal statements, and I'm not sure that being raised in and around rural poverty is that original.
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @seth.corley Both are useful. The trick to writing about ethnography and faith is keeping your essay concrete. You don't want to actually incorporate a theologically informed discussion of the Christian--not because it's off-limits, but because it's too abstract. Tell a story about your interest. Tell us about your passion for academia. Don't write an academic essay.

    As for rural poverty: don't worry about whether or not it's original; worry about whether it's true. People have written about every topic under the sun, but only you can write about YOUR experience.
  • seth.corleyseth.corley Alum Member
    29 karma
    Thnak you a lot, a really appreciate it!
  • seth.corleyseth.corley Alum Member
    29 karma
    *Thank
  • JengibreJengibre Member
    383 karma
    @david.busis I understand Yale has a question on their application about whether you had any help with the essays or application. In your experience, does answering "yes" have a significant negative impact? Thanks!
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @Jengibre I would advise you to answer every application question honestly. I don't meant to imply that you were thinking of lying, but you should know that a lie could haunt you long after you get into law school, and in the age of the internet, you have to assume that all secrets will out.

    No, I don't think answering "yes" will have a significant negative impact.
  • JengibreJengibre Member
    383 karma
    I understand you must answer truthfully. I was not asking if you recommend lying, but rather whether you thought getting professional editing help with essays can have a negative impact, specifically for Yale. My question was prompted by this blog post: http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2013/09/getting_into_an_elite_school_forget_the_consultants_don_t_write_about_naked.html. It says, "Getting outside help isn’t automatic grounds for rejection..." but that doesn't sound all that promising. I wanted another perspective from someone who has likely worked with candidates applying to that school.
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @Jengibre I see. In my experience, getting outside help doesn't seem to have much effect on Yale applications, but it's impossible to measure anything since the alternative is a counterfactual. Asha, Dean of Admissions of Yale, obviously prefers "pure" applications when all other things are equal, so you have to weigh the amount by which your PS stands to improve against her possible disapproval.
  • JengibreJengibre Member
    383 karma
    Thanks, David!
  • medianplus30medianplus30 Member
    36 karma
    To whoever wants to continue with this thread (if anyone does):

    I'm thinking about writing an addendum explaining why I have a low undergrad GPA. I don't really want to go into specifics, but I lived under extreme circumstances for two years while attending college. I was planning on not mentioning that in my personal statement, because there are other things I want to focus on in my essay (namely how I examine everything differently because I had to learn how to deal with others misjudging my intellect [I'm physically disabled]).

    Should I rethink not mentioning those extreme circumstances in my essay?

    I realize it could be difficult to answer my question without knowing the specifics of the situation, but I'm wondering if anyone wants to give general advice to those of us who are afraid they will end up writing a 'sob story.'

    FYI: I apologize if I'm disobeying etiquette in reviving this thread, but I guess it might be helpful if some of us continue to discuss questions they think many others may or may not have.

    FYI #2: this is Ashleyisbadname; I changed my name.
  • David BusisDavid Busis Member Moderator
    7375 karma
    @medianplus30 Yours sounds like a perfect case for writing an addendum. It's not hardship that makes a sob story, but a self-pitying tone. As long as you describe your circumstances factually, it won't be whiny. I think you should write it.
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