At the moment I have severe writers block. I can't seem to put my thoughts to paper. I want to lead off with the fact that I grew up in a somewhat broken home with an abusive father and I how I had to overcome that. I wanted to lead off with a statistic but finding these statistics have proven to be difficult. My mind then gravitated towards the idea of using a quote as an attention grabber. I am a huge fan of Stephen King and I found a quote of his that is very intriguing. “Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win.” I have two different ideas about how I would proceed from there. 1.) I would go into my experiences of my childhood (abuse, etc). 2.) The next line could read "that was certainly true for my father and , in some cases my mother." Let me know what you think!
Comments
I'm not so sure of this. Think about the impression you're trying to make on the audience - do you want the reader to feel good or bad after going through your PS?
Glad to hear you were able to overcome a bad childhood man.
I've read from several sources about writing personal statements that have advised against opening with a quote, or at least proceeding with extreme caution. From what I understand, it's much more likely to induce an eye roll than to serve as an effective hook. I really do love that quote, I'm just not sure about using any quote within the context of a PS.
Personally, I find quotes and intriguing opening statements must more attention grabbing than simply starting off an essay with an introductory paragraph (like any other essay in high school, university, etc).
I started my PS off with this:
*** What started out as an adventure would eventually become much more than that. ***
It documents my experience of obtaining my university degree overseas, in a foreign country. I had only myself to rely on financially (and emotionally for that matter). In my family, money was always tight, and I wanted to prove to myself that this couldn't hold me back from doing what I wanted to do in life.
In my conclusion, I reference back to my opening statement and reflect on how significantly my experience changed me as a person.
Good luck
Btw, after briefly skimming other responses, I still say that if the quote has a special meaning to you, then go ahead and run with it. But make sure you reference back to the quote or explain through your "story" why it has significance to YOU in the context of YOUR life.
For added safety, maybe call and check with your specific school choices for their thoughts on the issue.
It also doesn't tell us anything about you, in and of itself. You can go on to tie it back to yourself, but the quote itself doesn't tell us anything about you or your life experiences. It can't until you give us greater context (which I know you will, but read on).
I've generally seen schools discouraging the use of quotes. I don't consider anything to be an absolute rule and I do believe that there are ways in which a quote can be used well. I'd rather you not use one at all, but will concede that it can, potentially be a part of a well written PS.
What I will try to convince you, however, is that you should not open up with this, or any, quote. I think it's a real missed opportunity to open with words that aren't your own and that do not tell us anything about @combsni .
I'd strongly urge you to open with something that is your unique experience. Open with a story or moment that tells us about your unique experience. What's something that you, yourself, experienced in this household. Tell us where you started (stressful environment) and where you finished (your current life).
If you're really tied to the quote, use it after you've introduced us to your life.
Quote another author when you're discussing his/her thoughts and using their words makes more sense than paraphrasing - either bc it's no quicker to paraphrase or bc you need their exact wording to establish credibility for your claims about what they say.
Never in formal writing should you quote another author bc what they said sounds good. It's just going to look like you're stealing someone else's magic to embellish your own work. It's twice as offensive to use melodramatic sound bites, which have been known to induce vomiting.
I say trust yourself to bring out the depth and drama through your own concise and understated words. If the monsters are going in, better near the end than the beginning.
I wish you the best luck, sincerely.