I’m 38, a single mom of 2. Been out of school since 2000, finishing up my BA now I’m hopes to apply to law school in the next 2 years.
Anyone else in a similar position? How do you stay motivated? Any worries about juggling law school and a family? Do you think being older hurts our chances? I’ve been a paralegal for 9 years so I’m hoping that experience will help instead of hinder.
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I'm 23, however I just stopped by to say that my mom went back to finish college with three small children. She raised us on her own, juggled multiple jobs to make ends meet and took night classes. Her perserverence that I witnessed as a little girl has always stayed with me and it continues to empower me today as I'm preparing to apply to law school. I have the utmost respect for mothers who do it all on their own and still make time to grow. I hope nothing but the best for your future and your family.
Hi all! I'm in a slightly different spot from most of you. I'm 34 but single, no kids. My challenges are a little different. I'm thankful I'll be able to move to wherever school works best for me, but not having a family means that I'll be looking to fellow law students for moral support and friends in a new place. I'm definitely intimidated about the thought of being surrounded by a bunch of whip smart 23 year olds lol. I'll be the old grandma, who doesn't really party but still wants friends! haha. I'm not quite in the disabled category, but I do have some physical limitations and I'm actually excited to be in an academic setting where it won't be a bummer that I can't go skiing on the weekends, haha. So, got that going for me.
I do think what we have going for us is knowing ourselves and our needs much better. I know how to be more efficient, study hard but still get sleep. We'll be more disciplined than the young folks (generally speaking) which is not only attractive to professors but potential employers as well.
I did apply last cycle and made the decision to push back a year. I applied late which ended me up denied and on wait lists more than I think I would have otherwise been. But I will say, I got a few acceptances with generous scholarships, and really didn't feel anyone looking down on me from the admissions side. There are some schools that appreciate life and work experience more than others, and I'm sure employers will be the same way. But the good news is, I'm guessing most of us here have no interest in biglaw. That's the only place where I think being older, non-traditional students could set us back. They're not going to think that we'll put in 90 hour weeks and you know... they're right. That sh*t is for the 25 year olds lol. I put in my time and worked my butt off and though I still have a work ethic, I am not interested in the world of biglaw. Hard pass haha. I have read some stories of older students finding biglaw jobs though, so if any of y'all aspire to that, it's still possible.
Anyway, glad to "meet" you all here! :)
36 year old dad here, married, with kids in 3rd, 7th, and 10th grade. Wife is pursuing her Master's this Fall and I'm prepping for the LSAT this year. I've come full circle and I found myself unhappy with my career options. I don't want to go through life wondering what I could've accomplished if I pursued what I really loved. I'm also hoping to get my score into a range where I can get scholarship money. It's going to be full of challenges juggling family life and the responsibilities of law school. It's got to get done though. I wish you luck!!!
@adorsen00673 said:
Similar boat. 35, mom. I will have to do the M-F living away from home deal, and hopefully come home on weekends and breaks. The biggest advice is to rally your tribe. Friends, family, neighbors... they're all going to be necessary. Let people help you.
I'm also shooting for big scholarship or bust. Just the expenses of having to live away from home are going to create debt. I don't need that and all the school debt.
Does being older hurt us? Maybe a little. It's hard to study for this stuff and work on school and be a parent and work, too. So I think the k-JD kids have us beat there. But, I think we have a drive that they don't. We have seen the world, and we know this is what we want. We have had to make things work and suffered set backs those kids wont understand for a decade or two yet. We bring different perspectives and our own determination to get things done on time. We're also probably less likely to party, ditch class, and be reckless with our education. ;) I've heard that non-traditional students seem to be favored these days. No idea if that's really true.
Do I worry about juggling it all? Absolutely. It's pretty scary, to be honest. Will it all work out without me being there every day? How will 3 years of it impact my kids development if mom isn't around? How will those 3 years affect the other family members? Will the family adhere to the budget while I'm away? I do worry about it all. The school part is actually the least of my concerns. Not like we have a choice, though. And in the long run, this helps our family. It helps my kid in so many ways. It'd be stupid not to go if I got the chance to. So, it helps keep things in perspective. It helps keep me motivated, too, in a way. I don't really have an answer to fixing it. I think it will be a problem every parent has to overcome. The bright side is, there are plenty of success stories showing they got through just fine. And so will we.
What great advice. We should all form some sort of group so we can keep in touch when we are finally in the throes of it all. I agree with you about the concerns about being away for most of the week - I'm hoping that it all works out but yeah, the concerns are real. Having family and friends helping us through the law school years will be the key to success for us. Wishing us all luck!
Similar boat. 35, mom. I will have to do the M-F living away from home deal, and hopefully come home on weekends and breaks. The biggest advice is to rally your tribe. Friends, family, neighbors... they're all going to be necessary. Let people help you.
I'm also shooting for big scholarship or bust. Just the expenses of having to live away from home are going to create debt. I don't need that and all the school debt.
Does being older hurt us? Maybe a little. It's hard to study for this stuff and work on school and be a parent and work, too. So I think the k-JD kids have us beat there. But, I think we have a drive that they don't. We have seen the world, and we know this is what we want. We have had to make things work and suffered set backs those kids wont understand for a decade or two yet. We bring different perspectives and our own determination to get things done on time. We're also probably less likely to party, ditch class, and be reckless with our education. ;) I've heard that non-traditional students seem to be favored these days. No idea if that's really true.
Do I worry about juggling it all? Absolutely. It's pretty scary, to be honest. Will it all work out without me being there every day? How will 3 years of it impact my kids development if mom isn't around? How will those 3 years affect the other family members? Will the family adhere to the budget while I'm away? I do worry about it all. The school part is actually the least of my concerns. Not like we have a choice, though. And in the long run, this helps our family. It helps my kid in so many ways. It'd be stupid not to go if I got the chance to. So, it helps keep things in perspective. It helps keep me motivated, too, in a way. I don't really have an answer to fixing it. I think it will be a problem every parent has to overcome. The bright side is, there are plenty of success stories showing they got through just fine. And so will we.
I love all the comments/stories. After making this post I fell off the wagon. Cancelled my account, out all my LSAT books away (out of sight). But something just won’t let me let go of the dream. So I’m back. I’m going to re-purchase a plan and get back at it. It doesn’t matter how many times we fall as long as we get back up right :-)
@cam860 said:
@oceanlee14450 said:
@cam860
I'm not sure she is still on this board - I believe she got into her choice law school : ).
That seriously touches my heart you guys remembered me! I did get into all the schools I applied to and I had a hard time deciding but am so happy with my decision! I’m a single mom of 3 boys, 6,3,2. I have my father as a support system for whom I’m so grateful. Best of luck, you can do it!! Just do not give up. Be patient. I tried to rush it too much but eventually realized I was lacking, severely lacking, patience! Patience and perseverance are so important. You got this! I start school in 3 weeks and am stoked. Already have reading assignments to complete before classes. :) I too was a paralegal for about 9 years!
33 with a 7 month old, a full time paralegal job at a corporate law firm and still striving for law school.. lets do this !!!
@oceanlee14450 said:
I don't really have big worries about how I'll do once in law school -- I'm more worried about getting into someplace I want to go. I saw some stats that older students are accepted at lower rates than younger -- even with comparable scores/GPAs. Anyone know anything about that?
I applied last cycle, and I think it went pretty much to be expected for my numbers and also applying late. I got waitlisted a lot of places but I really think that’s my fault. I applied mostly end of January and into February. My biggest advice is get apps in much sooner than that! Haha. I was accepted into UCLA, WashU, and got into Cornell off the wait list. Accepted into all my safety schools. Wait listed at Michigan and Northwestern. It was a really competitive cycle and I applied late, so I think it turned out how it should have.
I do think it’s helpful to have your PS somehow address why you’re wanting to go back to school now and why law. There may be some schools that are a little tougher on admitting older students, but I think for the most part you should be fine. Having older non-traditional students adds to the diversity of their classes. And some schools (Northwestern in particular) really prefer students to havework experience. So I wouldn’t stress too much about it!
I've got many moons on everybody in this thread, but I am happy to report that the Adcomm people that I have talked to said that if you have a compelling reason why you want to do it, then age is not really a problem. People have been pretty encouraging about my application and I am older than dirt.
@72024 said:
hi there! 44 yr old mom to three, wife to one here. my oldest is 25 and he's starting law school in St. Louis this fall, my middle is 23 and still lives at home while she finishes school, and my youngest is 10 and she's a full-on mama's girl - attached at the hip.
I'm lucky because my husband's job (atty) affords me the flexibility to go to school without having to work outside of the home, so my jobs right now are parenting and studying. I've been working part-time-ish as a photographer (currently only shooting for stock agencies) for about 5 years and I love the work but I've always wanted to practice criminal law. I'm one semester away from graduating with my BA in Criminology.
I'm putting a lot of stock into the LSAT because for me it's imperative that I get a scholarship in order to go to law school. I need to go to Stetson Law because it's local to me - living away from home is not an option for me and I want to be able to participate in local prosecutor and PD clinics (since that's where I hope to work). But if I don't get a scholarship, it just does not make good financial sense for me to rack up $150k in student loan debt to work at a job that pays $40k/year to start ($80k at the high point). and while there are a few other fields of practice that interest me, the whole reason I'm doing this is to practice criminal law. the last thing I want to do is put myself in a position where I need to take a job doing something I really don't like just to pay off my loans. because if I don't get a scholarship offer and I don't go to law school, my worst case scenario is not a "worst case" at all - I'll fall back on my photography career.
I definitely deal with all of the "what if's" and "am I doing the right thing?" questions all the time. the biggest two for me are: "will my family or marriage suffer as a result of this?" and "do I really want to give up the freedom and flexibility that I currently have in exchange for the daily grind again?" everyone in my family is very supportive of me going to law school, but I do worry that they're going to resent me when I'm not here anymore in the ways that I am now - when I'm no longer readily available to them. I especially worry how all of this will affect my super-attached 10 yr old...she'll be starting middle school the year I start law school. middle school sucks as it is, I don't want it to be even harder for her because I'm suddenly less available. and then my concerns about giving up my current freedoms fluctuate - one day I'm excited about the opportunity to interact with like-minded, intellectually stimulating people and the next I'm thinking "you'll be 50 in about 5 minutes, do you really want to be starting a career when most people are nearing retirement?" my brain is a stew of conflicting thoughts.
@72024 you hit the nail right on the head about starting a career when others (like my husband) will be close to retirement. I do wonder about that too but like @jyarmo54 said above, I don't want to wonder what I could have done with my life if I had just followed my dreams. My sister just turned 50 and she switched careers at 40 and starting going to school for nursing. Now that she is 50 and done with school she is SO happy. That's what I want. I want to be happy finally doing something for me - that I love.
As far your 10 year-old - that is a tough one. Middle school is tough and she will be right in the thick of it. Do you have anothe family member or close friend that can be around while you are in school or studying? I think the most support your daughter gets will also be helpful for her. Also, remember, that she is growing up and who knows, this time in middle school may be what she needs to gain some independence.
As far as marriage - and this goes out to all married couples - I spoke with a former manager a little while back about going to law school. She is a successful lawyer who is just brilliant and she told me that law school is tough, allntime-consuming and if there are any problems in my marriage to solve them now. Because once we start law school those problems will be exacerbated by going to law school - specially that first year. All our time will be spent studying or going to class and our spouses will need to step up and be extremely understanding that we will not be around as much. The last thing we need is issues in our marriage and trying to study for an exam.
Wishing you luck mama - there are many of us moms (and dads) here to support each other as we go through this process.
hi there! 44 yr old mom to three, wife to one here. my oldest is 25 and he's starting law school in St. Louis this fall, my middle is 23 and still lives at home while she finishes school, and my youngest is 10 and she's a full-on mama's girl - attached at the hip.
I'm lucky because my husband's job (atty) affords me the flexibility to go to school without having to work outside of the home, so my jobs right now are parenting and studying. I've been working part-time-ish as a photographer (currently only shooting for stock agencies) for about 5 years and I love the work but I've always wanted to practice criminal law. I'm one semester away from graduating with my BA in Criminology.
I'm putting a lot of stock into the LSAT because for me it's imperative that I get a scholarship in order to go to law school. I need to go to Stetson Law because it's local to me - living away from home is not an option for me and I want to be able to participate in local prosecutor and PD clinics (since that's where I hope to work). But if I don't get a scholarship, it just does not make good financial sense for me to rack up $150k in student loan debt to work at a job that pays $40k/year to start ($80k at the high point). and while there are a few other fields of practice that interest me, the whole reason I'm doing this is to practice criminal law. the last thing I want to do is put myself in a position where I need to take a job doing something I really don't like just to pay off my loans. because if I don't get a scholarship offer and I don't go to law school, my worst case scenario is not a "worst case" at all - I'll fall back on my photography career.
I definitely deal with all of the "what if's" and "am I doing the right thing?" questions all the time. the biggest two for me are: "will my family or marriage suffer as a result of this?" and "do I really want to give up the freedom and flexibility that I currently have in exchange for the daily grind again?" everyone in my family is very supportive of me going to law school, but I do worry that they're going to resent me when I'm not here anymore in the ways that I am now - when I'm no longer readily available to them. I especially worry how all of this will affect my super-attached 10 yr old...she'll be starting middle school the year I start law school. middle school sucks as it is, I don't want it to be even harder for her because I'm suddenly less available. and then my concerns about giving up my current freedoms fluctuate - one day I'm excited about the opportunity to interact with like-minded, intellectually stimulating people and the next I'm thinking "you'll be 50 in about 5 minutes, do you really want to be starting a career when most people are nearing retirement?" my brain is a stew of conflicting thoughts.
https://www.google.ca/amp/s/amp.usatoday.com/amp/659481002 And https://www.google.ca/amp/s/www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/single-mom-of-five-goes-viral-with-inspiring-law-school-graduation-photo/
I think being older can give you some advantages. More experienced/ more acquired life skills /time management (generally speaking ) . Hats off to you for embarking on this journey.
Another nontraditional student here! You're in good company as we're seeing from the comments. :)
@gaflparalegal732 don't give up, I have met idiot attorneys that made me think, "damn if this buffoon can do then I can too!" remember the harder the road, the more you'll value the destination
I’m there with you guys. I keep wavering, especially after applying once and deciding to push back. I’m in the middle of job hunting too and may be getting an offer. It makes me question if I really want to go through with this or just keep trekking on a career. But at the end of the day, going to law school is the only thing I’ve been really excited about for years. It’s the only thing I’ve done that’s really made me motivated and believe in myself. It’s been a long journey, through LSAT studying, retaking, and now hopefully reapplying. But I think it’ll be worth it to do something that pushes me and forces me to believe in my own ability to do this. If you really want it, just keep at it and push through!
So many awesome people on this post - welcome to the dads and single older folks and welcome back to @cam860! You are so inspriring and I'm so happy that you are going to your choice law school!! How exciting that in just a short time you will be starting your law school career! Sending you lots of good vibes!!
I'm in my 30's, no kids, but wanting to go to Law school. I for sure am a non-conventional future JD, and I'm positive that all of us will have an advantage. It will make us better law students & lawyers!
@adorsen00673 said:
@gaflparalegal732 said:
The negative comments I get from people are- what about your boys? Won't they need their mom? Where will you find the time? What about working and paying the bills? I will be honest, the slew of negativity is overwhelming at times, especially when I (we) already know we are facing an uphill battle.
If I had $5 from every time someone asked those questions, tilted their head and asked "Really?", or said something like "Oh wow. You are SO brave to do that. I could never do that/ leave my kids/ etc", law school would probably be paid for by now.
I can only think that if it were my husband doing this, no one would bat an eye about it. But a middle aged mom? Stop the presses. No offense to any of the dads out there, as it's the same issues we all have (leaving kids, jobs, home, etc). Have any of you men gotten this treatment? I'm really curious to know.
The boys will be proud that their mom is going after her goals and dreams. You'll be leading by example. You will create more opportunities for yourself and your family. Why can't people see that? You'll be in a better position going to law school than not going. You got this!!! I haven't been telling many people about my plans. Keep it to yourselves. They'll find out when you graduate. LOL
I am older than a lot of you. I am 47 and got my BA in 1993 and plan to take the September LSAT. Most of the people in that test room probably weren't born when I finished college! I had an career in journalism, took off some years to raise kids, and decided I want a new challenge now that my boys are in middle school. I am not a single mom but my husband is out of town during the week for his job, so my plan is to attend class during the day while my sons are at school. I've been studying for months and have seen my LSAT score increase steadily, and I need a good one as my undergrad GPA is only 3.2.
I have some of the concerns listed above, mostly that my husband and sons, who are so supportive now, are not going to like it when I am not as available to them. I already am finding ways to roll off my many volunteer jobs and have told people that this coming school year is my last one for this-and-that committee. Family and school will have to be the priorities; I am lucky that I do not need to work for pay.
So I'm only 26, but still considered an "adult learner" by some schools. Some schools have specific scholarships for adult learners and have statistics for how many adult learners are in their law programs. I think anything that helps inflate their "minority" statistics will help you! Plus, you can make a great personal statement out of it. Your drive to expand your career after 9 years of paralegal work also suggests that you won't be part of the 1 in 3 students that drops out before your second year. Good luck!
You guys! I jsut want to hug all of you! This is the best thread! I love how all of us gals are coming together to share our stories of dreams, struggles, family, kids. Thank you for all your stories and inspiration!
As I write this I'm getting ready to work on LG for most of the day and get some LR in. Its a rainy day here in Jersey so the kids are happy staying in watching Odd Squad. That is the balance I have to find with studying and my kiddos. Have a great weekend everyone!
@gaflparalegal732 said:
The negative comments I get from people are- what about your boys? Won't they need their mom? Where will you find the time? What about working and paying the bills? I will be honest, the slew of negativity is overwhelming at times, especially when I (we) already know we are facing an uphill battle.
If I had $5 from every time someone asked those questions, tilted their head and asked "Really?", or said something like "Oh wow. You are SO brave to do that. I could never do that/ leave my kids/ etc", law school would probably be paid for by now.
I can only think that if it were my husband doing this, no one would bat an eye about it. But a middle aged mom? Stop the presses. No offense to any of the dads out there, as it's the same issues we all have (leaving kids, jobs, home, etc). Have any of you men gotten this treatment? I'm really curious to know.
@jyarmo54 said:
I don't want to go through life wondering what I could've accomplished if I pursued what I really loved.
This. So much, this. I have seen what happens when you do give up everything and wonder what would have happened. Generations of it. It's not pretty. And not just the adults suffer, either.